Wednesday Rewind: Torque by @destroytheearth

I'm sure many of you are familiar with the The Fast and The Furious franchise? but would you be intrigued to know that the same people who enriched society with that wonder created an even-more ridiculous gear-head cheesfest? Yes, it's Fast and Furious with motorbikes, only worse; it's Torque.

Friday Feature: Evans Above or How I Learned To Stop Worrying About Casting And Love Superhero Films by @CartoonBeardy

It has become something of an institution in recent years: an Internet merry-go-round surrounding casting of movies. This is now commonplace, but nothing new; since the days of Scarlett O’Hara, the public have always wondered who would play their favourite character. However, thanks to the Internet, one genre seems to come under a more intense scrutiny than most: Superhero films.

Newsflash: Chris Evans is Captain America by @destroytheearth

Various news sources, including the ever-reliable Empire Magazine, have confirmed rumours that Chris Evans has accepted the offer to play Captain America in both the upcoming solo movie and the Avengers team-up to follow.

Monday Movie: I Love You, Philip Morris by @destroytheearth

Biopics are funny things. They can be sad, funny, romantic, inspiring, thought-provoking, shocking and just plain weird; all of which can be said of I Love You, Philip Morris. However, all biopics fall into two categories: the factual and the fictionalised. Philip Morris is the former, at least in spirit - you couldn't make this up - and that, inherently, is the problem.

Monday Movie: Shutter Island by @destroytheearth

What's the recipe for a perfect movie? A perfect cast? A maestro director fresh from his first Oscar win? A creepy setting? Artful dream sequences? A cracking mystery? A twist you can see coming in the first five minutes, but when is actually revealed, goes beyond what you expect and shows all the excitement that came before to have actually been something pedestrian and dull, alienating the audience and undoing all the hard work done so far...? Hang on...

Trailer Park: Predators by @moviegrrl

Does this look like a team-orientated group of individuals to you?

Friday Feature: Matrix Drinking Game Reloaded by @destroytheearth

I've been meaning to introduce some of my patented drinking games into the Friday Feature space, and St Patrick's Day this week gave me the perfect excuse. I try to make sure they not only get you wasted, but also enlighten you on some facts about the film. To get the ball rolling, I'm reposting the article that began the whole concept. The Matrix films are packed full of religious, literary and philosophical symbolism, so let's take advantage of that to down some shots. Ladies and gentleman, the Matrix drinking game:

Wednesday Rewind: Unbreakable by @destroytheearth

Everyone has an "other favourite movie"; as in, "oh, I forgot that one, that's my OTHER favourite movie". You should all know by now that my favourite movie is Clubbed To Death, but my "other" favourite movie is Unbreakable.

Monday Movie: Alice In Wonderland by @destroytheearth

Burton's Alice In Wonderland arrived with very little ceremony, only whispers from cinemati of "Oooh, Burton doing Wonderland, that'll be good". Unfortunate then, that this is not Alice In Wonderland; it is Narnia, or rather, The Cheshire Cat, The Red Queen and The Rabbit Hole.

Friday Feature: The 10 Stupidest Superpowers In Film by @destroytheearth

***Warning: the below article is a semi-delirious rant from an incredibly anal geek and should not be taken in any way seriously - You have been warned***

If there is one genre that has defined 21st-century cinema, it is the superhero film. Like it or not, you can't deny it. However, Hollywood has fallen into the same trap that less-accomplished comic book writers have done for 50 years: using super powers as a deus ex machina-excuse for lazy plotting.

A powerful hero may be able to conjure any magic to win the day, but there must be rules to govern that magic, or the story descends into bad wish-fulfilment fanfic. Bad authors often half-realise this and create a near-omnipotent hero with one crucial weakness to add drama (eg - Kryptonite). Good authors, on the other hand, create finely-considered laws to rationalise fantastic story elements and build a mature, involving story around them.

I know many of you are going to say I am being churlish, but to you I advise that this is a local blog for local geeks and you are not welcome here... ahem.... So, to illustrate my point, I present for your consideration, the ten worst thought out super powers in film history:

Monday Movie: The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo by @lexx2099

Based on Steig Larsson’s bestselling Millennium trilogyThe Girl With The Dragon Tattoo is possibly the bleakest of his interwoven tales, finally making it to these shores after wowing the more hard stomached of the critics attending Cannes. The film, an uncompromising mystery thriller with some truly memorable – and disgusting – on-screen executions, kick-starts the trilogy in fine style, with The Girl Who Played With Fire and The Girl Who Kicked The Hornet’s Nest to follow in the near future and a Hollywood remake planned for 2012.

Friday Feature: Beards On Film by @lexx2099

When you imagine the classic leading-man names like Paul NewmanCary Grant or Dirk Bogarde spring to mind. These guys were intense, clean cut and dependable. Their thrusting chins and fast-paced dialogue powering plenty of two-fisted detective tales and epics with casts of thousands. If there is a deep-down manly essence that sums up classic-era Hollywood, then it probably smells like Clark Gable. If you look really closely though, you’ll notice a dissenter in the ranks; Errol Flynn. This borderline-Nazi, sheep’s-bollock biter (Honestly! Wiki it!) from Queensland had one crucial advantage over his fellows that eventually gave rise to the phrase ‘In like Flynn’. What could it be? What was John Wayne missing that let our Errol slip between the sheets of a thousand starlets? Answer: the ‘tache.   

As Hollywood started to grow up in the 70s, this sorely-overlooked aspect of masculinity finally had the chance to sprout, manly face fungus filling our screens at every opportunity. Of course it took a while to get it right - Dennis Hopper had nothing on Chewbacca - but these days, if an actor wants to add gravitas to his performance, there’s only one way to go: hairy. Look at Clooney (Syriana), Pitt (Jesse James) and even Christian Bale (ummm… Reign of Fire..  more of which later…). So, what, if anything, is this woolly monologue leading to? Why, isn’t the answer obvious? Ladeez and Gents, we proudly give you:
The Greatest Facial Hair in Movies!

Wednesday Rewind: Aladdin by @destroytheearth

Robin Williams catches a lot of flack nowadays, and deservedly so, but there was one role that he downright made: the genie in Aladdin.

Williams ad-libbed much of his dialogue, particularly the opening introduction, and, to this day, he is what most people remember the film for; and, of course, a lot of people remember the picture fondly. Still, revisiting it as an adult truly makes you appreciate how wonderful it is.

Trailer Park: Nightmare on Elm Street by @moviegrrl

I could, given the opportunity, rant for HOURS about unnecessary horror remakes (The Omen, The Hitcher, Last House on the Left, the proposed The Thing remake), but now and again one will surprise with it's effectiveness. Laugh all you like but there were bits of Rob Zombie's reboot of Halloween that were very effective.

As someone who is almost Kermodian about the Nightmare on Elm Street franchise, I was less than happy about the proposed reboot, even after I knew that Jackie Earle Hayley had been cast as Freddy Krueger. The fact that Michael Bay is producing also didn't fill with me glee, and Samuel Bayer's CV is a little sparse to say the least.

Monday Movie: The Crazies by @lexx2099

If your plan is to make an all-action popcorn flick, the Holocaust isn’t a port of call most directors would consider making, but Breck Eisner’s Romero reboot somehow manages to make it a completely acceptable analogy even while we’re watching Radha Mitchell fight off bands of bat-shit locals with a pitchfork.